I Can’t Pretend to be Normal

My Loves! There is so much to be sad about in our world! Let us now allow our wardrobes to be one of them!

It seems the more I grieve, the more I cover myself with sparkles, tutus, feathers, jewels, and color. Outward signs of grief have been a tradition from the beginning of time, and while most people equate mourning dress with black Victorian gowns, caps, and veils, there are many different mourning attire cultural traditions, dating back to ancient Egypt and Greece. I like to imagine even cave people had grief traditions involving putting a leaf behind their ear or at least rubbing soot on their faces when they lost their loved ones.

For me, I have invented my own form of mourning clothing and it is the exact opposite of modest black clothing or a soot-covered face. It seems the deeper I grieve, the more colorful and effervescent my attire.

I mean, to be completely honest, I have always ALWAYS had a unique way of dressing, even back in high school, when I would model my outfits after Mary Poppins. It is actually impossible for me to wear what the world calls “regular clothing”. If you look at an outfit and think, “Nice, Conservative, Well-Put-Together”, than it’s not the clothing for me. If you look at an outfit and think, “Whimsical! Witty! Wild! What is happening here?” Then that is probably the outfit for me. I don’t know why I’m the way that I am. I only know this:

I can’t pretend to be normal.

For example, sometimes I wear ice cream cones on my head.

I was taking my teenage daughter to the Rupaul concert in Boston a few months ago, and I couldn’t find anything in my closet that seemed right for the occasion. I finally put on my psychedelic sparkle jumpsuit, was thrilled that I could still zip it up, and then I felt sorry for myself that I would be underdressed at the Rupaul show. I added my gold sparkle platforms to add a dash of sparkle down below, and I added the sparkling ice cream cone for a dash of sparkle up above, and I still felt underdressed. Turns out I wasn’t underdressed, and in fact, was the only person attending who had dressed up at all, besides the queens onstage. I added a pink beach ball handbag for a dash of whimsy.

Last Thanksgiving I was feeling sad, until I went upstairs to my closet and put on my luxurious velvet jumpsuit and purple wig with butterflies fluttering around, and then I felt happy. (Wig by Fifi Mahony’s-my favorite!)

I’m sure I’m not the only one who matches their outfit to the flowers in their yard, but then again, it’s quite possible I AM the only one. It makes me feel like I’m one of them: perky, happy, colorful, bright.

I packed 20 dresses and 7 tutus in my pink suitcase for my European travels last summer. This was my sartorial ensemble for my dream day in Burgundy: strawberry dress, pink tutu, and matching strawberry handbag made by Kate Spade. Is it strange that I always assume others will have chosen a piece of the landscape to match their outfits? Alas, I am always the only one.

Every Halloween I host a Halloween-Palooza for my son’s grade. And I have various wacky witch outfits I wear, which I end up just wearing day-to-day in October because it’s perfect–the black cat dress and purple witch shoes!

I had a silver shimmery gown for the Peabody Essex Museum Gala, but it seemed a little plain to me, so I started searching for the right headpiece. I thought of finding Salvador Dali’s melted clocks, but then I thought, no, a kraken would be perfect! Lo and behold, I found the perfect Kraken, taking down a ship and called “The Awakening”, a perfect metaphor for my life AND for the nautical theme of the museum which began as a Maritime Museum called the East India Shipping Company back in the 1700’s in Salem. (You can read more about the headpiece by enter “Kraken” in the search bar of this blog. It was created by genius milliner Pearls and Swine in London) And of course, I had to wear my favorite festive Kate Spade bag–the champagne purse!

When wearing a large feather on one’s head, it helps to open the sunroof! I bought this headpiece at my favorite showgirl shop in New Orleans, Fifi Mahony’s! It’s a MUST on any trip to NOLA

And so I repeat: My Loves! There is so much to feel sad about in our world! Let us not let our wardrobes be one of them! And please send me the photos of you in your feathers and sparkles!! Nothing delights me more!

My Favorite Shops: (All Online, and nothing cheers me more than a fantastic headpiece or wig in the mail during quarantine!)

New Orleans: Fifi Mahony’s, Trashy Diva

Salem: Modern Millie

Burbank: Sidecca

Online: Pearls and Swine, Hellbunny, Pinup Girl Clothing, Lux De Ville, Retrospecd, Unique Vintage